Moving???

  There was a time, more than a year ago that I would have been excited with the idea of moving out of Evansville, and possibly Indiana. Up until recently I always felt like something was missing, a part of me left unsatisfied. But then I found the YMCA running group, a new love for running and competing in races here in the Evansville area. And now Dorian, with Dorian I feel complete and the idea of living my life out here in the Southern part of Indiana doesn't sound too bad really.
  Unfortunately Cameron has found what seems to be a once in a lifetime on this huge building........ in Illinois near Terra Haute, an hour and a half away from Evansville. There was a time in my life that this would have been exciting news to hear, moving at of this area and somewhere else......... but 1: It is still in Indiana, 2: Now that Dorian is here, I don't really want to move from everyone, 3: I've made a lot of friends here in this area with the running, 4: I don't know.
  Part of me is excited, interested and intrigued but most of me is nervous and reluctant. But as Cameron is always ready to point out; my feelings don't matter if they don't agree with his. I don't know if I would have felt this way 2 years ago, or if I would have been excited or not..... Last night he said it was very unlikely that he would get this building, but today he talked to one of the guys who own it and seems to be in a better mood than before. He has headed up there today for the guy to give him a walk through, and probably be up there until this evening. I will most likely have to take Dorian either with my on the run depending on the temperature around 6 or have mom watch him, not sure yet what I am going to do.
  I just don't know how to feel....... he mentioned how I can come down and visit with my family on the weekends, and the move probably wouldn't happen for another 4-6 months anyways but still.... my sister and I have just begun running together and training for the Half this October which I am sure I won't lose any of my training days during this and I will still be able to run the Half but what about next year and the following? I have a running partner now, the running partner I have been wanting for over 10 years... now all this is happening :( I mean Cameron did try mentioning that the town that this building was in had people running everywhere, young people, older people, seniors just running everywhere he looked......... I guess I just thought I would be excited if and when this day came :'( but I am not.