Government Always Trying to Hold You Down

   I can't put enough detail into how things have been going so well lately, but unfortunately there are always drawbacks to every good thing. Workouts this week have been going quite smoothly, haven't ran though due to the cold and the hint of an injury. I think I posted on here when the hospital bills finally caught up to us and now we are having to make payments on them monthly, yesterday came to a crappy end when I looked in our home mailbox and found that Capital One was in fact suing me. Luckily I called today and am able to settle it out of court for a total of $750.00 instead of paying their demanded $1,450.00 or whatever. I am just curious if this is to ever end, I am definitely done with Credit Card companies, and any other hospital bills we might get in the future will be paid no matter what. Saturday I am going to try and do a run, either on the Greenway or on a trail, not quite sure yet. We are having a family cookout on the 16th of April, that should be fun, I just hope it doesn't rain or snow and is great weather.

Started Today off Decent

    Today almost started off like shit, last night I had set my alarm clock on my phone to 6:00 a.m. but woke up at 6:30 not remembering whether it had gone off or not. So today I am going to buy an actual alarm clock, along with the bed topper for our Camper mattress. I had to go to the bank and reorder our debit cards for the personal account so that was fun.
     Well this morning was going well, until we found coolant leaking out from one of the machines onto the shop floor, I went ahead and cleaned it up (with Cameron bitching at me and Ethan about how we don't put things up, how the accessory parts to the shitty ass vaccum cleaner are missing), then we go outside and open the camper and unzip a few things, and then while shutting it again and going around tucking everything in, Cameron is still bitching so I take a risk seeing that some of the tarp is beginning to stick out and while tucking it in, Cameron slams the top down on my hand basically. I would have gotten my hand out smoothly had it not been for my stupid wedding ring.
   So, what started out as an okay day has shortly become a fucking shitty day which I wish would go ahead and get over with.

One Good Day < One Bad Day

     It would seem that I can never really catch a break being in this kind of work, I guess maybe it might be too much responsibility with something I am still not experienced with??????? One of our old Anodizing companies fucked us last winter with our sight pieces, we had 3 invoices, one getting to 60 days and the other two around 30 days; one day in December I am out running errands when Cameron calls me pissed off because Mike calls and says we have invoices past 100 days and he will not ship our parts til we pay, I almost lost my job then.  Turns out our latest one was rounding 60 days, so I get a check out for Next Day shipping with Fedex, this was the week before Christmas and they tried to deliver it 12-21, then 12-22, and then 12-23 and apparently Mike's decided to take vacation early though he promised to get the parts out before hand because he trusted that our check would get there. The check ended up back at us, by that time we had sent 200 sight pieces out to another anodizing company and get them back so we said fuck the check. Now, several months later they are sending us invoices to be paid so Cameron is having my send them an invoice for the non-returned parts, saying that we have proof that they were shipped............... no we do not, I did not start saving packing slips with the tracking number until about late January so we might just end up fucked on this. 
     Other that that mess, I am feeling sore from yesterday's run and am a little worried about tomorrow's race, but the good news is that I won't have another race until April 30th so I should be pretty well rested and healed by then.

So Much Excitement

    That last few days have been very pleasant, though I haven't been able to run since Tuesday. A cold front has blown in and will be here for a week or so, along with rain as well which really sucks.  I am so excited about our camper, I can not wait until we start camping in it, Cameron plans on selling it next year for $4500 and getting an decent RV. I want to go West so badly, I want to see the Rockies, Zion, Yellowstone, the Grand Canyon, every park there is. Unfortunately Cameron wants to wait until we having some like an RV though, so I must wait another year. I guess that won't be impossible, I have been waiting now for 23 years to go to these parks.

Change Your Stars!!!!!!!!

      That is the name of our boat, the name I gave our boat back in 2009, the first proof that we were actually going somewhere and that we actually have a future much more than just lower class. Today is another great day, another proof that we can change our stars and move forward rather than staying still or falling back. Today Cameron found and went out and bought our first Camper! A pop up camper that is, there really isn't too many words to describe the excitement we are all feeling, and at a really great price as well. I remember a while back how a lot of my family members preached that Cameron could never provide a future for me, never give me much more than what I had living with mom (it wasn't horrible, but hey mom, me, shauna, kara, and Jared deserved better than that), and many of them thought it would get worse, and how in just the last couple of years he has proved them wrong again and again. No, we are not millionaires, we are not rich, but we are above average and happy. We have a business in a large shop, we now live out in the countryish in a large, nice house with plenty of land to play with, we have a jet ski boat (paid cash full), and now we have a camper (paid cash full) that can fit around 4 to 5 people comfortably with still plenty of room. Things aren't always going to be easy and stress free, but we own outright more than what most people around us do, and we are always going to rise above it. The reason I named the boat "Change Your Stars" is what it means, from the movie "A Knight's Tale" where it was believed that peasants could never become knights or nobles, one was able to do it, one was able to rise from his peasant birth and become a knight..... in other words he changed his stars.

This Weekend & Today

    Saturday was great, the riding lesson was above great and the race wasn't too bad either for being a Inaugural first year race. Sunday was exciting, I didn't get to run on the trail but we got our grill..... almost didn't think I was going to get it. We ended up really liking one at Menard's, but when I went there to pick it up we found out they were out of stock on it so I was pretty pissed off. I got back to the shop and took Molly for a walk down at the river, then I was supposed to head home and meet a guy who was going to buy the Elliptical Trainer but he changed his mind. So I went on line and looked up what other Menard's was around, the closest one was in Princeton so I called and found out that they did have one grill left. I headed up there without any hesitation and got it; then by the time Cameron got home it was dark and we almost didn't put it together, when we got it together it wasn't igniting right, but eventually ignited. Cameron's got to get in there and see why the Rotisserie gas line isn't working but other than that it heats up fast even with the flames it their lowest so I am excited! Today, hopefully I will get to run on the trails, and Cameron will get to run at least a mile. Anyways, that is all.

Yesterday and Today

      Okay, so I blogged on my running thread yesterday but forgot to say anything on here. Out of 133 finishers yesterday, I placed 44th so I think I should be excited. Before the race I had my riding lessons which went pretty damn good in my opinion, we worked on the trot again, but we also worked on the canter and Buzz responded much more quicker and easier than the last time we tried it. He could've either been having a really good day, or has learned to respect me from our Play Day last Sunday when it was just me and him for an hour and a half...... I hope the latter is it. Today I did some deep cleaning on the house (mainly the kitchen and living room, and bathroom), then we are going to be heading to the shop and I will work on the race photos Jared took and the photos I took of the "super moon" last night. Then I will go for my 1 mile run in Wessleman's Woods probably around 2 p.m today, I have received my new trail running shoes and am very excited to try them out! Still here at the house cause now we only have one vehicle because Cameron let Ethan leave his car at Brittney's while they go on vacation (total inconsiderate bullshit). I plan to initiate myself into trail running this year and again really excited! 

Today's Waste of Time

     I have been here at home all day, because the alarm guys are here putting in our alarm system and with the amount of doors we have, it has been taking all day. I feel like this day has been wasted, I had to cancel my riding lesson tonight because I don't know when they will be finished, that is really upsetting but damn it this sucks. I just hope that I can still get out and run today, before evening and when it starts to get chilly again. I will probably leave Molly here at the house and head on to the River Front to do my run..... or go to the Newburgh Rivertown trail and check it out but not real sure. I've been trying to figure out where it is located, asking people but nobody is helping me at all and it really beginning to piss me off.

Spring Might Be Finally on It's Way

       I have been keeping my eye on the weather as always, but even more so for the past couple of weeks; hoping and praying that we might catch a bit of a break from this rainy, depressing mix. I think Mother Nature has decided to answer my prayers because starting tomorrow and going on into the next week, it is going to be sunny (no rain), above 60* and oh so good for running weather. My husband hasn't ran for over a week due to this crappy weather, but now we will be able to get in quite a few mileage thanks to the break. The race this Saturday is going to be beautiful as well, I will definitely be wearing my shorts these next few days when running..... hell I might have to shave my legs and go tan first!

The Play Day at EHC and Other Things

   I can honestly say I am so happy I went to the Play Day, it was awesome! For a whole hour and a half me and Buzz worked on trot, he was so much more responsive to the trot, I also worked on the post at a trot. We went out into the field and walked around and worked on some uphill and downhill, in and out of the stirrups. It was great to be able to work on things without trying to listen to Jill teach me, which can be distracting and a little difficult. We walked over some poles as well, I didn't work him on a canter because I kind of forgot how and didn't want to look like an idiot in front of the other three, but everything was great and went really well so I can not wait until the next Play Day!
    On the other hand, the race went great, I did so much better than I thought I would and my next race is March 19th so only a few days away and I am really excited. I have gained a lot of confidence since this last race, as long as I don't screw anything up, things should be slightly uphill from here.

Yesterday's Riding Lesson

     Yesterday's riding lesson was a bit difficult to say the least, I was still pretty out of it since the race and really wanted to sleep. The lessons are getting slightly more and more difficult, trying to remember  all the cues and when to use them is very difficult for me right now. I am hoping like hell that they will become easier and second nature soon. These one hour lessons are a bit stressful, I do feel rushed and it doesn't help that much and what really doesn't help is the fact that I do not have a horse at home to work with and practice my lessons with. Sometimes I feel I am going backwards, at least with every other lesson for the past couple of weeks. I just hope that it doesn't stay this way or get worse, I am in no way giving up but truly wish this was a little bit different. Today is a Play Day, from 1p.m. to 4p.m. and I can rent one of the horses for $20.00 so maybe I can possibly work a little more on a few of the lessons I learned.

Run of Luck Tomorrow Morning

    I am extremely nervous, in about 10 hours I will be running a 4 mile race. I wouldn't be so nervous if it wasn't for my legs still being tight and sore from Tuesday's workout, it is really just around my knee area. I am also really excited, I always get excited before a race though.... I guess it is the competitor in me, I love races because the adrenaline and thrill of everyone else around me, it just gets me so pumped.
       Besides that, as usual my husband is being an asshole which isn't unusual so I don't know why it is bothering me. I just can't stand this one sided, bullshit relationship, as long as life isn't inconveniencing him, he couldn't care less who it is affecting. Sometimes I really don't know why I even bothering trying to wonder why he doesn't care about my life, he has made it pretty clear that the only thing important in my life to him is HIM period. He couldn't care less about my running, races, riding lessons, fitness, or anything and yet I have got to be interested in everything going on in his life and world. It is just bullshit and gets pretty tiring, because when I react, he blames me for any drifting our relationship might be doing, rather than looking in the mirror and seeing how one sided he is making this relationship. On a better note, the race is tomorrow, and then it will be more than another month before my next one, so I will be able to heal and get back into shape for that one.

Riding Lessons

    Tonight's lesson was quite interesting, instead of my lesson horse Buzz, I rode Sparky. Sparky is definitely a clown and a goofball, always ready to test me. I didn't have to ask him a whole lot for the trot, he was willing to do it each time where Buzz was a bit more difficult. I can not wait til Saturday's lesson, I am so hapy to be back to taking 2 lessons a week. I stayed later just talking to Jill and her husband which was nice.

Haven't Felt This Great In a Long Time

     Last night I made the decision to get back to the gym this morning, for the first time since Valentine's Day. Last night I also went to GNC and bought the Nutrex Lypo 6 Black "Hers", it is a fat burner. It states to take 3 capsules in the morning, 3 capsules in the afternoon but not within 6 hours before bed (means 7 hours or more before I hit the sack). I took 3 this morning and my protein shake, got to the gym around 6:45 a.m. (I got up at 5:30 this morning "YAY!") and here is how it went:


7:50 a.m. - Treadmill / 15 min / 3.7mph / 4% incline
8:05 a.m. - Hyper Extensions (Back) / 10 lb weight / 8 sets of 12 reps
8:10 a.m. - Walking Lunges / 6 sets of 8 reps / 10 lb dumb bells
8:17 a.m. -  Leg Curls / 5 sets of 12 reps / 60 lbs
8:23 a.m. - Leg Extensions / 6 sets of 12 reps / 65 lbs
8:28 a.m. - Elliptical / 5 min / resistance 25 / 10% incline
8:33 a.m. - Hip Adductor / 5 sets of 12 reps / 60 lbs
8:38 a.m. - Hip Abductor / 5 sets of 12 reps / 55 lbs
8:43 a.m. - Leg Press / 5 sets of 12 reps / 60 lbs
8:48 a.m. - Leg Press Calf focus / 5 sets of 12 reps / 30 lbs
8:50 a.m. - Treadmill / 5 min / 3.5mph / 2% incline


     As you can see, my quality and effort had increased by twice the amount of sets I was doing when I had taken my two week break to start running. I don't know if the Lypo 6 helped or what, but it felt great and I am excited. For the last couple of months I was feeling like I had hit a wall going to the gym and just wasn't excited to go anymore until today. I have been going through fitness magazines and forums to build my inspiration in the last couple of days which I think has really helped.

Donald Trump MIGHT be running for 2012 Presidency

Hell Fucking Yeah, I have not been this optimistic about elections since............... hell since I could vote, and now that I know a real business man is thinking about running for presidency, I really truly hope he goes for it and wins. This man is a cut throat, no bullshit, all balls to the wall business man and we as Americans need that now more than ever. If he doesn't win, I at least hope it gets the ball rolling and opens citizens' eyes about what needs to be done in this country. One man/woman can not change the world, but they can start the movement.

A Better Day Thursday

       This wasn't at a gym but at home. I did core workouts and leg workouts with 5 lb weights on each of my ankles, I did the Plank Position for 2 minutes and 15 seconds. Then a few different crunches (3 sets, 12 reps each leg). Most the workouts I can't remember what their names are, but one was the "mounain climber", and then my own improvised donkey kick. Anyways, I feel great and am still wearing the 5 lb weights.

    Copied from my Strength Training blog, we didn't run today but I am glad for some time to workout. This week I did get back into doing core strength training again, along with the plank position.

First Thursday of March

     It has been almost two weeks since I've been to the gym, I know I need to go but I can not seem to wake up before 7 a.m. anymore and it is pissing me off. I can't seem to have a good night's sleep at all, and I do not know what is causing it, other than the fact that Cameron doesn't come to bed until almost 1 a.m. Next week I am going to add a lesson, probably on Tuesday and Thursday because Aerobics is on those two nights and I don't have school next week since it is Ivy Tech's Spring Break. I can stand this one lesson a week bullshit, I am so sick of not getting shit for being stuck in that office and working for free while Ethan gets a $100 every week, hell if Steph were in the office she would definitely be getting paid! This is bullshit, sometimes I seriously think about looking for an actual paying job but I know I might as well have my shit packed and ready to go if that ever happens.

Wednesday's Hump Day

      Fuck that asshole, I am so sick of being treated like some low down stinking piece of shit by him. At first I thought it would be awesome to have him as a running partner but now..... I could care less about what he does and I do not want him as a running partner. How the fuck can I run with a dick that sees me as some worthless servent of his? A running partner is someone who sees you as an equal and is there for you, just like a spouse should be, but no that is not the deal with this egotistical asshole. I can honestly say he has a God complex and needs therapy really bad, I am so sick of feeling like shit and being made to feel like shit because that makes him feel so much better. From now on I run by myself, I do just about everything by myself.

     About an hour later: looks like I am running with him, at least for now. I won't push him anymore on it though, on days that we should run, I won't say a word. I will just go and do my run either in the morning or evening and not even worry about him, if he decides to go run, that is fine but if he doesn't then that is even better.
9:00 pm: Same day, slightly a different attitude now. I am not going to delete or edit this post because looking back on it will remind me of my venting. He can be so aggravating and just mean about everything, that it makes me rethink a whole lot of things, but of course that is probably what he wants and hopes for. I really do want him to be my running buddy but he's even admitted that running just doesn't excite him like it does me.

Today Blows Major

   This whole day has been pretty crappy, it looks like I won't be running..... AGAIN, and the customers of our business have been just aggravating nonstop and just calling and calling. What makes this worse is my riding lessons are on Saturdays and once a week and so I have nothing that really makes my day now. This sucky ass weather has been keeping me from running (yes I know my grammar isn't good, but I don't care) and so I feel pretty caged and claustrophobic. God this day hasn't been great, and English class tonight which hopefully will be better than today at work has been.