I honestly don't know if I am just being paranoid or if I have valid reasons to think something is going on, not so much the late nights at the shop but other things. The fact that on everything like his phone, his nook, kindle, and probably downstairs computer has porn immediately in the google search. Then this last Tuesday night he calls to tell me he is going to go to Cross Eyed Cricket for dinner, doesn't even invite me to see if I want to go (I ended up eating a burger from Steak & Shake). His sudden obsession with Miley Skankin Cyrus (my issue is that she is such trash, not really attractive and her music sucks.......... that is what is driving me crazy). And then last night he forgot to put his truck in park up on the hill (the top of our driveway), leaves in 2nd gear and it rolls down the hill...... not a big deal with most people but with HIM that is a huge deal because he doesn't normally do shit like that...... unless something is on his mind and has him extremely distracted. Then this morning, as he is leaving for the shop he tells me Bob Sisson is coming to the shop and he's taking him to lunch...... Friday is the shop lunch day, we go somewhere all 4 of us together, not to mention he and the boys went to Cross Eyed Cricket Tuesday night without inviting me (I am assuming the boys went). I get stuck going to Fazoli's, get back and Bob isn't here yet but Cameron heads on out so I assume he was meeting Bob somewhere........ though my gut (or paranoia) is telling me it's not Bob he is meeting, and even if he is meeting Bob it is most likely at Cross Eyed Cricket where there is this "hot" waitress working there that he drools over, which would be why he didn't invite me Tuesday night or any other time he has gone out at night. If I stay as late at the shop as he and the boys do, he would have me go and get them something rather than us go out. Also, I can't assume that the boys would tell him that he is wrong to be cheating, because I know their fucked up loyalty to each other no matter wrong or right and they would just keep their mouths quiet about it.
Okay so going outside I guess Bob came to pick him up, because his truck is still here but still that doesn't make any difference and nobody saw who picked him up anyways. I just can't get this feeling out of my gut, I don't know if it's paranoia with the anxieties of waiting for the half marathon next Saturday, or if he really is up to something. It hurts though, to think about him having an affair... especially with all that is going on, our beautiful son, the business, our 10 year anniversary just a week ago, and not knowing what the future will hold for us, mankind and the Earth itself. With everything going on, I can't imagine why on Earth he would suddenly be having an affair, or just stalking someone or something.......... Is it just paranoia? Should I bring it up, or just leave it alone and keep chugging along?
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