The Latest in Updates

  Molly is doing well, perhaps even better than she was a couple of weeks ago; I think she is really enjoying the cold weather. I am so happy I didn't take her in last Monday, I knew in my heart she wasn't ready to go and it would have been wrong. I've been regularly taking her and Rocky out in the woods behind the shop, only for about 10 or 20 minutes, she really enjoys it.
  Dorian is really getting the hang of crawling now, and other milestones. He is definitely a crack head and I am going to have to keep a really close eye on him, which I have no problem doing anyways. He hasn't cut any teeth yet, but is constantly teething so I am wondering when the first one will come through. My milk supply is completely dried up now, I barely made it to his 7 months this past Tuesday. It sucks, I really want to nurse him for a year but that won't happen now. He is healthy and strong, and I pray it stays that way.
  I am down to 140 lbs, and down to a size 5 in jeans. I'm going to need XS sweat pants now too, I purchased mediums a week ago to find they were too big, so I purchased smalls and they're still too loose for my taste. Losing weight and getting back into shape is expensive lol.
  Yesterday I ran 5 miles for the first time since September, probably my fastest too (at least that I can think of). My left knee did start to ache around mile 3 but not bad enough to cause me to stop.

Saying Goodbye to My Dearest Friend

   Today at 5 p.m I have to make the hardest choice in my life so far, I have to take my best friend in and say goodbye to her. This is a decision I don't want to make, I want to ignore it and wish this was all a bad dream but it is not. I am trying not to think about it, but I don't know how I am going to handle it when that time comes, when I have to carry her to my Tahoe and take her in. I am scared, scared that I will lose all strength in my legs when I walk her up to the doors, I am scared that I won't be able to handle this at all. Cameron is going to come with me I hope, mom is going to watch Dorian at home and then Cameron and the boys will dig her resting place. Part of me wants to go alone, but I know that is not a good idea because I don't know where my mindset will be on the way home.
   I got home yesterday, and I looked into my girl's eyes and knew it was not the right time. Colder weather has set in and somehow her health is improving to a degree, she is more interested in food now than she was a couple of days ago though still being picky about it. We decided not to take her in, to give her a little longer because it just doesn't seem right. I am trying to think with a level head and not my own needs, because I don't want her to suffer more than she already has but she just doesn't seem ready to let go.

My Little Boy, my Life, my Running

    This past Saturday I bought and put my son's crib together, he slept in it for the first time Saturday night but I woke up and brought him to bed with me around 2 in the morning because our furnace was acting up and it was like 65 degrees in the house with it being around 30-35 outside. Then last night he slept in it, but he has been teething really bad here lately so he has been waking up constantly. I'm just wondering when the teething stops and the teeth actually start coming out, all I feel are bumps. He is getting closer and closer to crawling, but still prefers to lunge or other ways of crawling. I weighed him today at 17 lbs or so, but I have no measured his length which is probably around 29 inches or so.
   I weighed myself this morning at exactly 141 lbs, and I am excited because I am now 7 lbs away from my goal weight. Yesterday's 4 mile run was amazing and tough, I stayed no only under 10:30 a mile but the last mile was under 9 minutes and that was freaking awesome. I am getting excited again and believe that I am ready to start introducing more fartleks and speed workouts during my runs.
   I have been trying to get back to 4 minutes on the plank but I begin to get a headache around 1:30 and I have to stop at 2 minutes dang it.